ROB DIES, 2

CUT TO

ROB, standing where he reads the monologue.

ROB
Welcome back. Well that’s our show for tonight. This was our first show of the second season of BU Tonight so I just want to thank everyone involved with the show and all of you for watching and I hope you’ll stick around because we’re very excited about this season, it’s going to be great.

DEAN ELMORE enters from backstage.

ELMORE
Hello, Rob.

ROB
Oh, wow. Dean Elmore, everybody. Thanks for dropping by, what brings you here?

ELMORE
Well, I just wanted to congratulate you on a great season of BU Tonight and wish everyone good luck for the second.

ROB
Well thank you. That’s--

An ASSASSIN rushes at ROB and ELMORE.

ASSASSIN
Sic semper tyrannus!

The ASSASSIN takes a shot at ELMORE, but Elmore grabs ROB and hides behind him. Rob takes the bullet in the stomach and falls to the ground, coughing, grimacing, and clutching his stomach. A STAGEHAND tackles the assassin and drags him away.

ELMORE
Thank you, Rob. You saved my life.

ROB
What was that?

ELMORE
What are you talking about?

ROB
You grabbed me! I wasn’t going to take my bullet for you.

ELMORE
Well I’m the Dean of Students. I can’t allow myself to be killed.

ROB
So then move out of the way! Don’t shove a student in front of a bullet meant for you.

ELMORE
Oh, Rob, I wouldn’t have been able to get out of the way. I needed you to take that bullet for me.

ROB
I’m not your bodyguard. You’re the Dean of Students, you’re supposed to be working for us. I don’t have to take a bullet for you if I don’t want to, that’s my prerogative.

ELMORE
That’s where you’re wrong.

ROB
What?

ELMORE
Read your Lifebook, Rob. Page 117: “Should the Dean of Students be in any mortal danger, it is the responsibility of the student to protect him for the good of the University.” You have read the Lifebook, haven’t you Rob?

ROB
…Yes.

ELMORE
I thought so. (looking at the camera) Well again, have a great second season, everyone.

ELMORE exits. ROB continues lying on the ground, moaning. CHRISTIAN enters.

CHRISTIAN
How’re you doing, Rob?

ROB
Oh, well that bullet kind of hurt, I’ve lost a bit of blood, but I think I’m going to be OK.

CHRISTIAN
Uh huh.

CHRISTIAN puts his shoe on ROB’s neck and holds it there. Rob looks up at him in shock, choking.

CHRISTIAN
(con’t)
I’ve been looking for an opportunity like this for months.

ROB
(choking)
What are you doing?

CHRISTIAN
Take a bow, O’Reilly. It’s time for you curtain call!

CHRISTIAN twists his shoe, snapping ROB’s neck. Rob slumps over and dies. Christian looks at him, panting excitedly. He looks at the camera.

CHRISTIAN
Tune in next week when our guests will be _____!