Saturday, April 22, 2006

Burlington, CT: the USA's Worst Place (excluding LA, New Jersey and large desolate stretches of the midwest)

The latest issue of Hartford Magazine features a profile of my sleepy little hometown that really makes me realize what an awful place it is. I've never had a ton of town pride, but I always thought it was kind of nice for what it was: a scenic suburb in the middle of the woods. At the very least, I knew we were at least better than the likes of Harwinton and Bristol. But this article has really opened my eyes. Unfortunately, they didn't print the article online, so I'll provide a synopsis:

  • Pretty much in an indescribable spot in the middle of nowhere, belonging to noplace (Litchfield Hills? no. Farmington River Valley? not really. Hartford County? barely.)
  • Full of ignorant small-towners who make minor problems into major issues, mainly because there's nothing the fuck else to think about.
  • Quaint small-town traditions (campaigning at the local dump, see others below) eradicated, replaced by gaudy banalities of every bland suburb like Dunkin' Donuts and CVS
  • Village Foodmart: gone, Johnnycake Airport: gone, historic buildings: gone, waving man: dead
So there it is, folks. I strongly urge every Burlington resident to read a copy of this article if you want to see your hometown's ass nailed to the wall. I'm barely even exaggerating; it really is amazingly negative. We can't even look good in a puff piece in a puff magazine! Something is very wrong.
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1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Ya, when the highlight of your town is a CVS, then thats pretty sad. I mean the only thing that comes close is maybe the bike trail (ooooooh). And the reason this is, is cause were right next too Farmington, Bristol and so close to Torington. Its not cost effective for any store to build here cause stores in the other towns are so close.

Plus what sucks is the town is pretty much split in half, or atleast seems so to me. There is the Farmington/Torington side which has LSM, Town Hall and shit, and then you have to drive like 4-5 minutes through nothingness down Route 69 (with holds numerous jokes which can be made) to get to the Bristol side of Burlington which has Lark Garda and....well it has Lake Garda.

Though, thank God that Burlington is finnally getting some cell phone towers at LSM and the Firehouse. Which along with the "expansion" of the High School is the biggest news we have.

And I would certainly rather live in LA or New Je......ya I'd rather live in LA then Burlington. I'd just worry about getting swallowed up by an earthquak. Ok, enough rambling, but I feel pretty much the same as you on this topic.

12:15 AM

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