Short survey

Could I ask you a few questions about the service you received today?

What service?

Well, I made you that sandwich.

Not a service, really.

Food service, all right?

It was already made, though, you just pulled it out of the fridge.

Listen, shut your mouth, and take the survey. Two minutes, OK?

Well, I--

What, got someplace to be? You fat-faced little goblin, just answer the damn questions as they come to you.

I guess--

Question one. On a scale from one to ten, one being "awful" ten being "the best," how would you describe the service you received?

Handing me the sandwich you mean?

...

Oh. Uh, yes. I guess--seven. Yeah, seven.

OK, seven. Was that so hard?

So can I--

On a scale from one to ten, one being "awful" ten being "the best," how would you describe the speed with which you received the aforementioned seven-point service.

Two.

Two?

Well, I still haven't eaten it, so I would say much slower than I expected.

What, you got someplace to be, hotshot?

Not really.

Didn't think so. You here with a girlfriend?

No.

Group of friends? Family?

I came here with my co-workers.

And they probably came because they had to.

Something like that.

So I guess, since you have nobody here who's waiting for you or anything like that, speedy service is not one of your foremost concerns.

Well, I have to catch the bus back in--forty-five minutes.

They'd probably leave without you otherwise, huh.

Maybe.

Because you're the kind of person who gets forgotten a lot, right? Left behind?

I guess.

Thought so.

You did.

Last question. Would you recommend this establishment to a friend?

If I had a friend, no, I would not.

Excellent, thank you.