Me Vs. LeBron James, birth through high school

LeBron Raymone James (IPA: [ləbrɑn dʒeɪmz], born December 30, 1984 in Akron, Ohio), commonly nicknamed King James, is an American All-Star small forward in the National Basketball Association who plays for the Cleveland Cavaliers.

Christopher Hill Sartinsky (IPA: ?, born December 9, 1985 in New Britain, Connecticut), commonly nicknamed Shrimp, Fetus or other similarly demeaning things, is an American above-average student at Boston University who writes for the unpopular weblog Shrimp Products.

Beginning in his junior year of high school, James was highly promoted by the national media in the United States as a future NBA star. He was selected with the first overall pick in the 2003 NBA Draft by the Cleveland Cavaliers at the age of 18, becoming only the second high school player taken at the number one draft position.

Beginning in his junior year of high school, Sartinsky was highly promoted by friends and classmates in Burlington as an OK guy. He was selected during the 2003 regular admissions cycle by Boston University at the age of 17, becoming one of tens of thousands of high school students selected by that school in 2003.

High school

Freshman year

James attended St. Vincent-St. Mary High School in Akron, Ohio. He was the starting point guard on a team led by James' future best friend and manager Maverick Carter. Although Carter is commonly referred to as James' cousin, they are not actually related. With James at the point and the primacy of Carter, the team cruised to a perfect 27-0 record and won the Division III state championship.

Sartinsky attended Lewis S. Mills High School in Burlington, Connecticut. He was in a musical called "Anything Goes" in which he portrayed an anonymous sailor who was not very good at dancing--a touch added by Sartinsky himself. With Sartinsky hidden deep at the back of the chorus, the musical wasn't very good. He was often teased for lagging behind his classmates in his physical development.

Sophomore year

James took over the helm of the team after Carter's graduation and averaged 27.8 points, 7.5 rebounds, 5.9 assists, and four steals for SVSM en route to another state title. He was subsequently named Ohio's "Mr. Basketball"and selected to the USA Today All-USA First Team — the first sophomore to be so honored.

Sartinsky was given a speaking part in a nonmusical play called "You Can't Take It With You" and had about ten lines en route to another mildly successful school performance. He was subsequently called "funny" by his mother and grandparents who had come to see the show, but went unmentioned in a write-up featured in the Spartan Scroll.

An avid football player in addition to basketball, James was also able to add to his resume the distinction of being First-Team All-State as a wide receiver for his high school team. However, injury concerns influenced James to concentrate solely on basketball.

An avid saxophone player in addition to drama, Sartinsky was also able to add to his resume the distinction of being first chair in the school's wind ensemble. However, his distaste for marching and his (mostly unfair) reputation as a tap-dancer earned him derision in the eyes of the band's conductor and his bandmates.

Junior year

In James' third year of high school his stats improved even further. He averaged 29.7 points and 8.4 rebounds, and was once again named Mr. Basketball Ohio. In addition, he again found a spot on the All-USA First Team, and was named the 2001-02 Gatorade National Boys Basketball Player of the Year. It was then that his nickname "King" James would become a household staple in Ohio.

In Sartinsky's third year of high school, he grew a couple inches, much to his relief. He was in two dramatic productions, including a musical in which he played a King mute until the final scene, which suited everyone fine as Sartinsky could not sing, though the play still required him to dance. In the other play, he would play an unpopular loser. It was after this performance that his reputation for portraying unpopular losers in school plays would become an LSM staple.

In his junior year, he appeared in SLAM Magazine which was the beginning of his nationwide exposure.

In his junior year, he began writing for the Spartan Scroll. He wrote an article about a British substitute teacher named Miss Mader who lived across the street from the school.

However, the St. Vincent-St. Mary basketball team failed to defend its state title when it moved up to the more challenging Division II and lost to Cincinnati's Roger Bacon High School. James attempted to declare for the NBA Draft, petitioning for an adjustment to the NBA's rules of draft eligibility, which then required the completion of high school by a prospective player. The petition was unsuccessful, but it led to an unprecedented level of attention on him as he entered his senior year. By then, "King" James had already appeared on the covers of Sports Illustrated and ESPN The Magazine. His popularity soared to new heights, forcing his team to move from their playing at the school gym to the nearby James A. Rhodes Arena at the University of Akron. Celebrities such as Shaquille O'Neal attended some of the games, hoping to get a glimpse of the prodigious young basketball player. A few of James's high school games were even televised nationally on ESPN2 and regionally on pay-per-view.

Sartinsky began applying to colleges. His sloth and fear led him to put the process off as long as possible. Some of his applications were unsuccessful, but it led to an unprecedented level of scorn from his father who mocked Sartinsky's first choice, Boston University, without end. His popularity at school remained exactly where it had been throughout his time at school. Celebrities such as Dan Patrick worked at ESPN just fifteen minutes away from Sartinsky's home in Burlington, though none of them ever had any reason to have anything to do with him. A few of Sartinsky's plays and band concerts were even recorded by his mother on the family camcorder.

Senior year

Gloria James touched off a firestorm of controversy when she was allowed to use her son's future earning power as collateral to secure a bank loan to buy an $80,000 Hummer H2 for her son's 18th birthday, prompting an investigation by the Ohio High School Athletic Association (OHSAA). Under the OHSAA guidelines, no amateur may accept any gift valued over $100 as a reward for athletic performance. When James later accepted two throwback basketball jerseys worth $845 from NEXT, an urban clothing store in Shaker Square, in exchange for his posing for pictures to be displayed on the store's walls, OHSAA stripped him of his eligibility. James appealed and a judge blocked the ruling, reducing the penalty to a two-game suspension and allowing him to play the remainder of the season. However, James's team was forced to forfeit one of their wins as a result.

Michael Sartinsky touched off no controversy when he replaced his old Jeep Wrangler with a new one and allowed his son to drive it to school. It was not a gift; the Jeep belongs to Sartinsky's parents, though Chris' father told him that the Jeep would have been his had he been able to score a 1500 on the SAT. He was probably joking. Sartinsky was allowed to work at EbLens for one weekend--for which Chris had pressed for years since he did not want to apply for jobs and was never called for an interview--on the condition that he would stop bringing it up with his father.

Despite the distractions, the Irish won a third state title, and James, for an unprecedented third time, was named Mr. Basketball Ohio and to the All-USA First Team. He earned MVP honors at the McDonald's All-American Game, the EA Sports Roundball Classic, and the Jordan Capital Classic. Although it was a foregone conclusion, by participating in more than two high school all-star events, James officially lost his NCAA eligibility.

Despite the distractions, Sartinsky rose to the position of editor at the Spartan Scroll, where he was one of an unprecedented five students assigned to the position. He earned the honor of becoming section leader of the saxophones, performed in two school productions (portraying an unpopular loser in one). Although it was a foregone conclusion, he was not recruited as a basketball player by any NCAA Division I programs, because although he enjoyed the game, he could not shoot and was still very small.