Me and my R.G.I.C.

When the history of the 21st century is written, the defining moment of the era will be when they invented the process leading to the first Reverse Gender Identical Clone.

Reverse Gender Identical Cloning wasn't even on the radar for most of the first half of the century. Human cloning itself was taboo -- the people were overwhelmingly against even investigating the possibility. Stem cell research had, at best, tepid support. Genetically modified foods, for all their benefits, were viewed with suspicion and protested. If you had said in 2037 that, within five years, every American over the age of 16 would want their own clone, they would have called you crazy and locked you up in one of the country's Shame Pens for eight decimesters at least. But that was before Dr. Jeff Greco changed the world of cloning forever.

Of course, everyone remembers Dr. Jeff Greco's press conference was held on February 26, 2038 -- the date is celebrated every year as Clone Day, with our Clone Parades and Clone Carnivals. None of us knew what it was about, back then -- all we heard was that an obscure west coast doctor had an announcement he claimed would shake the science world forever.

He read a brief statement about the as-of-yet untapped benefits of human cloning. The assembled press corps grumbled -- had they been taken in by a fraud? Was this Dr. Greco a madman eugenicist -- another Hitler II in the making?

But after the statement, he gestured towards a curtain in the back. Out stepped what was, in some ways, the most beautiful thing we had ever seen. It was Dr. Greco's Reverse Gender Identical Clone. Dr. Greco explained that its genetic code was identical to his own in every way, except it was given female genitalia instead of male genitalia. Indeed, they looked exactly the same, but for the Clone's generous hips and bosom. Dr. Greco's Reverse Gender Identical Clone batted her eyelashes at Dr. Greco. He smiled and seemed to lose his place, overwhelmed by lust. But no one noticed. A nation was captivated. None of us found her beautiful on her own -- it was her symmetry with Dr. Greco we found beautiful. Dr. Greco slipped a hand between his female counterpart's thighs -- she squealed with delight.

Reverse Gender Identical Clones were immediately a sensation. People from across the country flooded Dr. Greco's lab with requests -- give me my Reverse Gender Identical Clone. The trendsetters got their Clones first. A person walking around New York City or Los Angeles who wasn't holding his or her Reverse Gender Identical Clone's hand, or sensually biting his or her Clone's earlobe was an outcast. People fell in love, became infatuated -- they would not leave their rooms, they were so sexually enthralled with their Clones.

As the Reverse Gender Identical Clone craze spread through middle America, even Dr. Greco's well-staffed lab had trouble keeping up with the demand. Imitations started popping up around the country, promising a clone "TODAY!" with up to 99% genetic accuracy. But they were poor replacements for the originals -- that missing 1% seemed like a very small thing, but the imitation clones failed to inspire the overwhelming lust a complete genetic match inspired. Customers who bought these imitations reported feeling overpowered by despair in their clone's presence -- it was as if, when they looked deeply into their clone's eyes, they were staring directly into the Void. Ironically, in these small differences, people could notice only their clone's similarities, and felt it was a transgression akin to incest. These shops quickly closed up -- only Dr. Greco's Clones would suffice.

The natural next question was, could we breed with our Reverse Gender Identical Clones? Scientists struggled to set their own sexual longing for their genetic pairs to the side so they could study the issue. But their results were decidedly irrelevant. People would try to breed with their Reverse Gender Identical Clones regardless -- indeed, this was all people were interested in doing -- so why try to stop them? Once someone had their own opposite-gendered Self at home, breeding with anyone else became unthinkable -- a relic of a primitive, absurd society without Reverse Gender Identical Clones.

There were a few radicals who were against the idea of Reverse Gender Identical Clones from the start. They formed groups whose main purpose was to separate Clone-Pairs wherever they found them -- they would break into houses, late at night, when Clone-Fornication had finally ended for the night, and kidnap one, leaving a ransom note for the other. This rarely ended well. Once separated from their other-gendered half, both Clones and Originals would become violent, go berserk -- destroying property, tearing people apart with their bare hands, not stopping to rest until they were with their other half again and the terrible burning in their loins had been quenched and they were once more coupled with their Genetic Equals.

We have found, after all these years, that breeding with Reverse Gender Identical Clones is, indeed, impossible. Pregnancies are rare, and even when they do occur, they yield nothing more than tiny genetic mishaps who die quickly, or more strangely, clouds of choking dust. But that is OK. The world has come to terms with the idea that this will be the Final Generation. Breeding, we have all agreed, was nothing more than a kind of trial and error, to bring us to this point, where we all know that our deepest psychological and sexual needs will always be fulfilled, by the magical embrace of our own arms.