Shrimp Products: Corporate Sponsorship
Certainly my most profitable post to date.
Money line: Look for more of this at Hanes Presents Shrimp Products Humor Blog (brought to you by Subway--Eat Fresh)
A long overdue excerpt from the screenplay to my upcoming Jared Fogle biopic "235"
Truly the emotional turning point in the movie and basically my life's philosophy (and the note at the end is completely true).
Money line: JARED: No. There won’t be any more fights and there won’t be any more violence. The best revenge is living well. And I’m going to lose weight and I’m going to live well...And then I’m going to fuck his girlfriend.
My work ethic could use some work
The part about draping lunchmeat over rolls is sadly true.
Money line: Having recently paid little attention to the health videos we had been watching while the girls were out of the room, I assumed that I was beginning to go through puberty. I anxiously awaited my growth spurt and wondered what good noticing girls would do me with my blue lips, rapidly receding hair line, and violent uncontrollable tremors.
OH MAN I HAVE ART HORN'S EMAIL ADDRESS OH MAN
This is a classic moment in Shrimp Products history waiting to happen. I just need an idea.
Money line: Maybe Hartford Magazine wants to write about Art Horn.
Complete June Archives:
0529-0604
0605-0611
0612-0618
0619-0625
0626-0702
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